Have you ever wanted to do something so badly that it aches deep down inside? Has that same ache gnawed at you until you finally do something about it? Do know that you know that you know you were meant to do that thing? Yeah, me too.

This is not your average personal finance post, but then again I’m not your average personal finance gal.

Dreams, Intuition & Calling…

I’ve learned a thing or two in my 46 years here on earth and yet some days I feel like I know nothing.

The one thing that I know is when God implants something on my heart so strongly that I cannot deny it. It’s like I’m breathing just for it and if I deny it, I might stop breathing.

That’s how I feel right now and I’m sorry that this post is going to be rather vague but I’m no ready to write about specifics yet. That is mostly because I haven’t talked to my family about this and they read this blog.

I’d rather tell them in person first.

But that doesn’t stop me from writing about how this makes me feel. As much as I feel I’ve got to go for this thing, I’ve got to write about it tonight. I think you’ll understand too.

What We Are Created For

I believe we were each created for a distinct & unique purpose. Some of us figure this out at very young ages.  You know those children who know exactly what they want to do when they grow up. Yeah, that wasn’t me and chances are it wasn’t you either. I think those are more outliers than the norm.

Most of us have to fumble through life. We go forward and try stuff. Then we try some more stuff and fail so we go back to the first stuff. However, we are unfulfilled so we scratch it all and try something totally different.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Eventually and hopefully we figure out our purpose. And when we do it’s glorious and scary and fabulous and exhilarating and terrifying all in the same breath. It’s why we were born.

There are forces that want us to succeed and walk in our purpose. Why? Because when are on purpose, people are helped, lives are saved, and love is experienced.

Because we live in a dichotomous world, I believe, there are forces that don’t want us to succeed and try to throw us off track. Especially when we are on the precipe of breaking out, these forces are strong. That happened to me.

The Good Team Wins

You can give in to the bad force and get completely lost. I walked in this darkness for years, often in a blur. However, there were sprinklings of clarity and I clung to them when I was in the throes of addiction.

I felt the pull to get out. People were literally praying me out.

I made it out.

God wants me to walk in my purpose and this passion. This knowing inside of me cannot die. It’s gotten so strong that I’d be a fool to deny it. Who’d want to deny something that great anyway?

I mean, isn’t that what we all look for in life? Isn’t that why we watch romantic movies or documentaries of extreme heroism? Furthermore, isn’t that why we love a comeback story and root for the underdog?

Yep, that’s the good stuff in life. The stuff that causes tears to stream down our face and we don’t even care who sees it.

We feel alive and have clarity about exactly what our mission is here on earth and nothing or no one can tell us otherwise.

Money Can Aid or Hurt This Purpose

I knew in early sobriety what my purpose was but I had this albatross of debt around my neck. This albatross caused me to feel like I was suffocating. I was tied down to my debt.

Something was posed to me and I remember thinking I want to be able to say yes. Although, in reality, I had to say no because I had an obligation to my debt. That heartache of saying no is where I got the gumption to pay off my debt.

I’m out of debt now.

Now, I can say yes.

I want you to know that money is just a tool. However, if you are in debt then you understand what I’m about to say. When we have to pay off past transactions, we miss opportunities.

It’s rather simple really. When our money is already earmarked towards something, we cannot freely choose to do whatever.

I know there is a time and a place for debt. For example a mortgage to your house. I’m sure someday I’ll have another mortgage on a house…or maybe not.

I’ll tell you what – not having to pay my money towards anything feels spectacular. Moreover, it has freed me up to consider something completely extraordinary.

Call to Action

What’s that thing that gets you going and is stronger than any other thing? The thing that you wake up thinking about every day?

My advice is to write about that thing. Talk about that thing. Take action on that thing.

This life is but a mist and before you know it, it’ll be over.

If it’s not possible to go after it now, ask yourself why not? Give yourself permission to dream a little and formulate a plan. Even if it seems insurmountable.

I’ve found that I have the inspiration to stick to hard plans when I know the purpose.

However, I never want to shame anyone. Furthermore, I don’t want to forget that some people have more challenging life situations with odds stacked against them. It’s hard to dream when you cannot make ends meet in your daily life.

But you, everyone, deserve to dream and this is why I want to include more posts on the basics of financial literacy.

Closing Thoughts

Feeling alive – that’s where I’d like to stay. That’s what I’m feeling right now as I’m taking action towards my dream.

Could I fail? Yep, BTDT and I’m sure I’ll be there again. However, I’ll take going after my dreams and failing rather than doing the monotonous stuff and wondering.

So I’ll leave you with the words of Alfred Lord Tennyson,

“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. “