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Why and How to Speak the Same Financial Language with Your Partnerships

December 30, 2019 By Deanna 27 Comments

So you may be asking why a single woman is writing a post about speaking the same financial language with your partner. I do have thoughts on this topic; however, I really want to learn more about it so I listen to the wisdom and experience of others. I’m pleased to offer you Good Nelly’s thoughts here. Good Nelly wrote a quality guest post for me in the past titled, The Debt Gender Gap and How to Reduce it Being a Woman. You are in for another treat with this post. Take it away, Nelly…

Photo by freestocks.org on Unsplash

Why and How to Speak the Same Financial Language with Your Partner

I am sure that you have heard that couples need to speak the same financial language. Men and women need to be on a similar page for a better financial future.

But have you wondered why? Let’s find it out.

Why you need to be on the same financial page with your partner

You need to speak the same financial language because:

Financial compatibility is important for a good personal relationship

Research suggests that one of the primary reasons for divorce is financial incompatibility. It might be detrimental if both of you don’t consult with each other before a major purchase. Oftentimes one is the spender and the other one is a saver.

Communication is important in any relationship

You need to communicate with your partner when you decide to speak the same financial language. And, when you can communicate with each other properly, you can clear any misunderstandings. In turn, it strengthens your personal relationship, too.

Signs that you’re speaking the same financial language

 So, how will you know that you’re on the same financial page with your partner? Check off any you can agree with.

¤ You have similar financial goals

It becomes easier to achieve financial goals if both of you have common goals. Even if you don’t have similar goals, you can help each other to achieve both of your goals. If you do so, then you’re on the same page.

¤ You plan a budget together

In continuation of the last point, I would like to add that if both of you can plan a realistic budget together and save a significant amount, then you can attain your individual financial goals.

¤ You discuss things with each other

Both of you discuss before spending money, especially if it’s a big-ticket purchase. Each of you discusses your spending habits with each other. This helps to clear the misunderstanding and thus helps strengthen the marital relationship too.

¤ You organize your things together

You’re on the same page if you organize your things together. Whether it is planning a budget or organizing your household things, it means both of you can come to a decision together.

How you can speak the same financial language for a better future

Here are a few tips to speak the same financial language with your partner.

Plan a budget together

This is the prime requirement to speak the same financial language. So, sit with your partner, discuss both of your financial goals and decide how you’ll achieve them. It is better to set goals as a team instead of deciding about goals individually.

When you plan a budget, try to follow it. It will be easier if it’s a realistic budget and both of you can follow it effortlessly. Also, modify your budget from time to time and make modifications when required.

Do not be rigid with the budget

It is not a crime if anyone splurges a bit occasionally. It can happen. Don’t criticize your partner. Instead, have some room in your budget for splurging a bit.

There is nothing wrong with planning a weekend tour or a dine out. The problem arises when splurging becomes a habit. Occasional splurging can help you to be disciplined and follow your budget in a better way.

If you splurge on something, then you can cut down on other things to balance the budget.

Another thing, designate an amount for amusement too. And once you attain one goal, celebrate it.

Be honest with your financial life

Honesty is the basis of every relationship. This holds great importance even when you decide to share your lives.

It is said that it takes years to build trust, but it can be broken in just a second. And, once trust is broken, it is sometimes impossible to get it back.

So, do not hide money related matters from your partner. Financial experts say that it is necessary to reveal financial secrets when a man and woman decide to share their lives together. For example, if you’re overburdened with debts and facing difficulty to pay it off, share it with your partner and being willing to receive his/her help to solve the issue.

If one partner makes some mistake, there is no harm in admitting it and learning a lesson from it. You’ll have the help of your partner to solve any financial issue.

Select a date and time every month to discuss money matters

Conversation and communication are two key things in a good relationship. So, to speak the same financial language, select a date every month and mark it in your calendar when you’ll have just financial discussions.

Make the discussion interesting by planning a dinner date with your partner at your home. If you wish, you can also crack open a wine bottle to enjoy the moment (Deanna here – as long as you are not in recovery for alcoholism!). Make it a happy and cherishable moment instead of a task. Then solve your financial issues.

Doing so, you can enjoy some we-time too.

Solve your debt problems

Try to get out of debt as soon as possible. When you’re in debt, you don’t have extra money to invest for a better financial future. Therefore, you should repay your outstanding balances, as fast as you can.

To do so, you can choose debt consolidation or debt settlement as per your financial situation. If you choose settlement, you can get rid of debt relatively fast. You won’t have to repay the entire amount. However, your credit score may suffer a bit. Choosing consolidation can help you repay your multiple balances in full and that too through single monthly payments.

In this regard, I would like to mention that usually, one partner is more proactive than the other one about dealing with finances. If you’re the one, then take the initiative to make your financial life happier. This will help you both to plan a better financial future.

Author’s Bio: Good Nelly is a financial writer who lives in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. She has started her financial journey long back. Good Nelly has been associated with Debt Consolidation Care for a long time. Through her writings, she has helped people overcome their debt problems and has solved personal finance-related queries. She has also written for some other websites and blogs. You can follow her Twitter profile.

Photo by Filipe Almeida on Unsplash

Filed Under: Personal Finance Tagged With: Budgeting, Communication, Couple Finances, Guest Post

Comments

  1. gaynycdad (@gaynycdad) says

    January 8, 2020 at 11:06 pm

    Yeah, I know you are right, but this is not how we do it. My spouse is happy for me to deal with all the finances, and yes, it is a shock that we did not get divorced over my bad decisions! I have learned to be more careful, and I do occasionally ask his opinion, although with these uncertain times, it is hard to know which way to go.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 14, 2020 at 11:00 pm

      Yes, but friend, you’re on the same financial page because your wife relies on your decisions and supports you. You have a very good understanding.

      Reply
  2. Ann says

    January 9, 2020 at 4:04 am

    You have got some great advice here, thank you so much for sharing!

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:22 am

      Thank you. 🙂 I will be happy if you are benefited.

      Reply
  3. Ntensibe Edgar Michael says

    January 9, 2020 at 5:16 am

    Nnniiccceeeee….I love the fact that you advocate for partners to keep discussing their financial situation regularly. It always keeps everyone in check with their plans, executions and expectations.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:23 am

      Yes, I believe that communication clears a lot of misunderstanding. So, it’s always better to discuss and plan your financial life. It will help you in your personal life too.

      Reply
  4. Stacie says

    January 9, 2020 at 7:20 am

    It’s so important to make sure that you’re on the same financial page as your partner. Money is the cause of so many arguments in relationships, and it can even ruin them.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:24 am

      Yes, money if one of the major causes of misunderstanding; it may even lead to a divorce. On the contrary, if the financial front is ok, it can strengthen relationships.

      Reply
  5. Ayishia says

    January 9, 2020 at 9:57 am

    These are wonderful tips and suggestions. I’m a single girl also but I certainly want to be prepared.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:25 am

      Yes, certainly. Financial advisors are of the view that you should talk about money even when you’re dating. The discussion can help you realize each other’s money mentality, and to be on the same financial page in the future.

      Reply
  6. Marcie W. says

    January 9, 2020 at 11:25 am

    As with anything marriage related, communication is key! Thankfully finances have never been an issue for my husband and I, although we are focused on putting more money into savings this year.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:25 am

      Very good! I always believe that good communication is the key to a good relationship. All the best for your mission of saving more!

      Reply
  7. Leslie L Denning says

    January 9, 2020 at 12:04 pm

    I know it sounds kind of strange, but my husband and I have always kept our money separate. He pays some bills, I pay others. We try not to stress about money, and we have been married 45 years, so I guess it’s worked for us. It’s something we’ve never had to fight about.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:26 am

      Yes, it works. Having a joint account is not always required. Understanding is more important. Both of you have divided your financial responsibilities, which help to attain your individual financial goals.

      Reply
  8. TheSuperMomLife says

    January 9, 2020 at 1:30 pm

    I truly believe that finances can make or break a relationship. It’s the hardest part and you really have to be on the same page.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:26 am

      I agree. I have often heard incidents where financial problems have led to various other problems among couples. So, it’s always better to take out time, discuss, and decide financial issues.

      Reply
  9. Brianna says

    January 9, 2020 at 3:56 pm

    Great article! So many of these are so important. I took the Dave Ramsey class in college and still follow so many of these.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:27 am

      Yes, the debt snowball method motivates a lot to repay debts. And once you see the result that you’re paying off debts one after another, it boosts your confidence.

      Reply
  10. Matt Taylor says

    January 9, 2020 at 4:26 pm

    Years ago, I can’t remember where I read it, but read a statistic about the two main causes for divorce in the United States were infidelity and money. Open and honest communication is a must! Especially when finances are on the line. I am single, but still find this topic very useful. Because hopefully I won’t be single forever. lol

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 14, 2020 at 11:06 pm

      Yes, definitely not. 😃 But, make sure you have a financial discussion when you’re dating. And, you know, financial infidelity is also one of the reasons. So, communicate well and have a good relationship. All the best!

      Reply
  11. Eileen M Loya says

    January 9, 2020 at 9:08 pm

    Very sound advice. My husband and I do not keep secrets when it comes to spending. We have a shared bank account and we both know the password to the online banking app. Any major purchase is discussed and mutual agreement is always in place.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 10, 2020 at 5:27 am

      Wow! Surely both of you will plan a wonderful financial future. All the best! When you discuss and decide a major purchase, both of you also chalk out how to save money or repay the debt later if you use a credit card.

      Reply
  12. Lily says

    January 11, 2020 at 2:38 am

    This is such a responsible post. Speaking the same financially language help the couple have a better relationship.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 14, 2020 at 11:07 pm

      The institution of marriage is dependent on communication. And, having a clear idea about each other’s finances goes a long way in a marital relation.

      Reply
  13. World of Faz says

    January 11, 2020 at 6:45 am

    Woow this is interesting and so nicely detailed !! I had no idea about half of this.

    Reply
    • Good Nelly says

      January 14, 2020 at 11:07 pm

      Yes, don’t hesitate to a monetary conversation with your partner or spouse. Make it an interesting affair 🙂. You can call it a money date.

      Reply

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  1. How I Managed to Repay My Credit Card Debt - Recovering Women Wealth says:
    February 11, 2020 at 8:01 am

    […] comes from a lady I’ve met in the personal finance world. Additionally, she has written a few guest posts for me previously. She goes by the name Good Nelly in the personal finance […]

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About Me

My name is Deanna and I am happy to be on this redemptive path. I got sober from drug addiction/alcoholism in 2010 and returned to a faith in Christ. Additionally, I finished digging my way out of debt in 2017. Today, I’m learning to be a wise steward/investor of my resources while helping other women find their victories too. More about me.

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